How to to fit in like a local in Bristol
A new city can be daunting, and you’ll need to ask yourself some questions:
Are the locals friendly? (Yes very)
Will they accept an incomer (Yes of course)
How do I assimilate into Bristol life smoothly?
Well fret no more, we at Accommodation Unlimited are 100% Bristolian, and have loads of experience of helping people move to the city, just follow our helpful guide and you will be a Bristolian in no time.
Do not talk like a deranged pirate or put on some cod-yokel accent. It is insulting and only people from Weston or Bridgewater talk like that. Just talk normally, over the months and years you will start talking like a local. You will be adding l’s to words ending in A without even knowing, soon you will be “getting your bananals down Asdal” like the rest of us
Don’t say: Oooh-arrrrr
Do Say: I got a great ideal, let’s get a flight to Americal
The only acceptable drink is cider and there is only one acceptable cider: Thatchers Gold, it used to be Blackthorn but after the 2009 Blackthorn recipe controversy Bristolians now stick to Thatchers. The only exception to Thatchers is if you are in a cider pub, like the Coronation Tap or The Apple, when rough cider is the order of the day. If you want to look like an outsider, order a Magners with ice.
Don’t say: Barman, a bottle of Magners with ice in the glass please
Do Say: Cider I up, me babber
Bristol was a small city that annexed the outlying villages. Don’t forget to add village if you live in Clifton, Westbury or Stapleton, it shows you know the difference and are therefore a local. Then there is the North/South divide. People in the North are from Gloucestershire and people from the South are from Somerset (See sport below). North Bristol tends to look down on all of South Bristol apart from Southville which now has honorary North status.
Don’t Say: I live Lower Clifton (Southville)
Do Say: I lives in Southville
Bristol has two football teams, two cricket teams and one rugby team. Note it is not acceptable UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES to support Bath Rugby. That is for Barbour wearing Londoners who have weekend homes in the Cotswolds.
Which football or cricket team to support depends on where you live. If you live South of the river it is compulsory to support Somerset and if you live North of the river you support Gloucestershire – simple . The tricky one is football. Traditionally the South of the city supported City and the North East supported Bristol Rovers, and that is still a rule of thumb. But whilst the mighty Robins (City) have got bigger, the Gasheads have gone down and it is less obvious. You are just as likely to find a City fan in BS7 as you are a Gashead. The last true bastion of Gasheads is Kingswood
Don’t Say: I think I’ll go and watch Bath this weekend
Do say: COYR (Come on you Reds)
Bristol had an elected mayor called George Fergusson. He wears red trousers but is an independent. He has caused controversy (especially in Clifton Village) by introducing a Residents Parking Scheme throughout the city. Bristol’s politicians have let the city down over the years (see both Bristol football team’s stadium fiascos) You fit in by complaining loudly about George Fergusson and then voting for him at the election.
Do Say: George Fergusson is a red trousered t**t
So why are you still reading this? Grab your gear, pack your car, leave London and head on down the M4 - Bristol’s waiting for you!